Friday, September 23, 2011

Twice the Trouble: 2nd Campaign Challenge &&& Hook a Teen Challenge

1 pen.
2 challenges to make amends
1. Angry Cafe Rant with a Passion
2. a Sip of the SuperNintendo Geek Girls Novel
Let's begin !<(*.*<)

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Write a blog post in 200 words or less, excluding the title. It can be in any format, whether flash fiction, non-fiction, humorous blog musings, poem, etc. The blog post should:
  • include the word "imago" in the title
  • include the following 4 random words: "miasma," "lacuna," "oscitate," "synchronicity,"
If you want to give yourself an added challenge (optional and included in the word count), make reference to a mirror in your post.
For those who want an even greater challenge (optional), make your post 200 words EXACTLY!

1. Angry Cafe Rant with a Passion
I come to the cafe to get my homework on, and my munchies too, and feeling flirtatious, which are all fundamental reasons why cafes exist.

I’ll tell you what is NOT.

It was apparent God would oscitate at the lacuna of misfortune still pierced through my day, but I didn’t expect an asshole like you to sit near me rambling to your stupid ghetto friends about how you licked the most nastiest part of God's anatomical creation, caring nothing about MY homework or other life-altering projects interrupted within the vicinity of your assholitude, dude.

The thick miasma of your narcissistic inconsideration of not knowing YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT(!!!) made me deeply regret my kindness to watch your laptop you dipshit dumbass.

If I could only reverse time, take your laptop in the bathroom and passionately show you my despising hatred for your pissing on everyone's afternoon like an underwearless titan, leaving your immortal mark to haunt us until cafe closing, then I’d pardon the synchronicity of events beckoning your arrival into my life.

And you didn’t even acknowledge my profound glare of terror at you either.
You Asshole! You Asshole! You Asshole!
Don't come back to my cafe again.
True story.
I always end up watching someone's laptop in a cafe.
What an entrepreneurship I would've established had I made away...
With my five-finger discount!

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It's time to enter your first 250 words of your YA or MG manuscript entries on your blogs for the  Can You Hook a Teen? blogfest contest. 

2. a Sip of the SuperNintendo Geek Girls Novel
Title: SuperNintendo Geek Girls
Genre: Pop Fantasy
School. The blackly brown Plague imitating lawless authority, a self-sex-having abomination that poops out children of dismal origin and names itself the narcissistic mother of our mournful civilization. 

School! By god! Even a supreme, all-seeing entity such as I-- am forced to hurled out the few planets I ate for breakfast today… for this self-sexing entity makes destiny-destruction an innovation by strapping long, ungodly things upon their waist to ferment rough love by night and, by day, serve the blackest of academia into the rear-ends of innocent, youthful victims of scholasticism.

“God save the Christian!” said Rina, fire engulfing her hands, “Can’t I just repent by hating him?! O Jesus can’t it be that easy?”

Leodie’s milk box was in his lips, his throat stopped at mid-gulp, “Uuh, you talkin’ ‘bout that boy behind you?”

He clearly saw Rina’s heart explode in her eyes just before she turned around, only to see nothing but Sterd the nerd pass by.

“Made ya look!”
"You're so GAY!" She frightened Leodie, unaware of her passionate regret!

She laid back on the seat, staring at the glary lights, “save me…”
“Yo!” An Asian face intruded, “you look like you just peed the bed or something.”

“Etna!” Rina sat up, liberating herself(and Leodie) from any more anguish.
“Herro,” greeted Leodie.

“Screw you,” Etna middle fingered.
“No, no, not today.”

"Alright Rin-chan," began Etna, "what was SO spectacular that you called me up 3am last night?"

School ain't nearly as bad as I let on in that slight blurb.
A rancid turd within the devil's cauldron it is,
and he's trying to make a birthday cake outa it, he is.

N-E ways... those are my entries.
thx for stopping by.
If you want to read more fun shorts, check out the other entries from Rachel Harrie's contest

My entry is 60


  1. oh holy crap, that made me laugh. rambling to your ghetto friends about how you licked the most nastiest part of God's anatomical creation, - wow, i'm a little stumped but ok. girl, boy and what body part? don't answer - this is a rhetorical question. you are awesomely intriguing.

  2. Note to self: do not laptop sit in cafes.
    Great use of the words. This made me Lol.

  3. But how do you really feel? I love this!

  4. LOL Hilarious! I loved this like: like an underwearless titan

  5. I'm with Bridget: Tell us how you really feel!

    This was hilarious - the frustration was was rolling off the screen, and you have such a great voice! And don't worry, I didn't read this on a laptop in a cafe either. :)

    Mine is #3.

  6. Angry much? This was funny from the title until the end. Thanks for the laugh and good use of the words in the Platform-Building Campaigner Challenge.

  7. You found a way to use those "unique (mind-bruising) words in a hilarious way. LOL. Thanks for visiting my blog and staying to chat, Roland

  8. A delightful blend of humor and mindless rage. Well done! "Underwearless Titan" indeed (it's going to take a few days to get rid of that visual!).

  9. LOL. I love the mix of anger/humor in both stories!

  10. I love how the narrator takes on a distinct voice. Very funny and entertaining. Good job.

  11. lol, nice mix of anger. And awesome imagery with "underwearless titan"

  12. I seriously need to enter the cafe scene. Not to bother people. Your entry totally cracked me up!

    Great job! :)

  13. Thank you, all of you. Your words are quite the fuel for me to get me confident in writing and writing in these specific ways you guys love.
    thx 'gain.

  14. Hi,

    At last I'm getting round the campaigner challenge.

    You put together a hilarious piece of word-smithing and all credit to you for slipping those darn awkward words in with such flare and seeming ease! ;)


  15. You tell 'em, girl! Don't hold back! :D

  16. Excellent use of the words - glad I stopped by to read this magnificent rant!:)

  17. I believe I share your slightly misanthropic attitude, I enjoyed your blunt humor and the general tone of the story. You are something else..:).

  18. I am now going to start using the word "assholitude". Because that was awesome. I feel like it's always a little cathartic to read someone else's rant, especially when it seems like they end up hating the general populace as much as I do. XD

    (BTW -- I finally decided to do this challenge. >.< Had to wrack my brain for an idea, but you nailed it.)

  19. LOL, love it. Great use of the challenge.

  20. XDD, I think your bg is AWESOME!!! Disgaea 2 is one of my fave SRPG. Poor prinnies, they get picked on so much, well "it's not my style, too pick on those that are weaker than me"
    "DOOD..your awesome!!.. dood" xDD I know he doesn't say that. Have u played disgaea 3??.